It’s not often that you come across someone who is genuinely living the life of their dreams. Many of us are struggling just to get through the life we have and even those of us who are quite happy often have a secret image of what our fantasy life might be like. Most assume that it will always be just that – a fantasy. But what if it’s possible to make that vision a reality? When I found myself talking to one of those rare souls who has done just that, I had to ask: what advice would you give to people who want to live their dream life but don’t know how?
Building Soul Sparkle:
I initially contacted Hayley Hunter Hines to find out more about the “Soul Sparkle” experiences she has been sharing with groups for the past several years. Soul Sparkle experiences look like little dips into paradise – dream vacations in exotic places with fantastic food, yoga and the like. But the focus is not on mindless self-indulgence. The experiences aim to help women live during and after the experience with greater passion, purpose and presence (a constant theme in all that Hayley does). As her website states, the goal is that you leave “feeling deeply loved, nourished from the inside out, supported in sisterhood, and fully seen for the beautiful soul you are.” To facilitate these experiences and to allow other teachers to hold retreats in her favorite spots, she has created “Sanctuaries” in Italy, France, Spain, Peru and elsewhere.
These experiences are only part of the Soul Sparkle brand. Hayley has also developed a range of products from body scrubs and oils to candles and journals that facilitate her customers treating themselves with love and compassion. She also has a line of signature Soul Sparkle jewelry for which she collaborated with collective of women artisans in Padre Ramos, Nicaragua. As part of the Soul Sparkle family, Hayley has helped facilitate improvements in nutrition and housing for the jewelry makers.
As she described all that she has built since walking away from 20 years in the corporate world, she observed that “basically I created a way to do all my favorite things”. She travels to the places that fill her soul, she spends time with the man who she describes affectionately as “my love”, she enjoys cultural cuisine immersion, teaches and practices yoga and personal growth, assists others in growing their businesses, and helps those who are less fortunate. In short, she is fully and joyously living the life of her dreams. Two things struck me as her story unfolded. The first was that all that Soul Sparkle is and everything Hayley is up to is maximizing each aspect of what philosophers and psychological researchers define as essential to happiness: enjoyment and pleasure, engaging in fulfilling and meaningful activities, and developing strong relationships. The second was that in living her dreams, Hayley was doing something extremely rare, and that I would be extremely stupid not to ask how she got there.
Living the Life of Your Dreams:
I noted how how feel people actually live their dream lives as she does and she agreed. So, I asked if she could provide some advice to those who wish to do the same. Her answer was an enthusiastic “yes” – she had to learn to really savor life, is deeply grateful for the life she lives and wants as many people as possible to do the same. So, what follows are Hayley Hunter Hines’ three keys to living the life of your dreams. They are simple, but not necessarily easy. Since nothing truly good and fulfilling comes for free, if you want to live the life of your dreams, here is some of the very rewarding work ahead of you:
THE FIRST KEY: GET CLEAR ON WHAT YOUR DREAM LIFE IS. It’s different for everyone, so spend some time visualizing it. What does it look like? What does it feel like? Get to know it with certainty. But it is very important, she emphasized, not to be so attached to how, where, when or with whom it happens. For example, she said, you may want a loving relationship in your life, but avoid trying to insist that “I have to find love with Bob”. Bob may not turn out to be a great match for you. Focusing myopically on trying to win his affections may actually blind you to other, better opportunities for love. In other words, be clear about the kind of life you want, but leave the details to your higher power and be open to what may be surprising ways in which your dream manifests.
THE SECOND KEY: BELIEVE THAT YOU DESERVE IT. Many of us have pretty strong inner critics and some of us have absolutely vicious ones. Sometimes that is deeply ingrained from childhood from parents or religion or schooling that pointed out more of the negative about us than the positive. It may develop later as we inevitably make bad decisions or fail to live up to our own standards. All of us face self-criticism at some level. But you will never allow yourself to live your dream life if you think you don’t deserve it. As a result, it’s vital to acknowledge and truly believe that while you’re not perfect, you do deserve good things. As Hayley put it “you get to this place through self-love and self-acceptance.” If you can develop the self-love it takes to believe you deserve to live your dream life, the next step is allowing yourself to receive it.
THE THIRD KEY: GIVE YOURSELF PERMISSION TO HAVE EVERYTHING YOU DESIRE: Hayley describes this as perhaps the most important but certainly the hardest of the keys. For one thing, it can be hard because you may have to sacrifice something comfortable for something amazing. She walked away from a good six-figure job for much less certain prospect of chasing her dream, “who does that?!” she laughed. Another obstacle to overcome in giving herself permission to live her dream was learning not to be afraid to disappoint others. She points out that we do many things out of obligation even when they don’t really contribute to our happiness or get us closer to our highest goals. She made a habit of not doing anything she didn’t feel called by her higher self to do. While it may sound selfish to fly across the ocean to a one of her luxurious Sanctuaries rather than spend a holiday at home out of obligation, the opposite is actually true. When you give yourself permission to live your dream, you can be much happier and more successful. The happier and more successful you are, the more happiness and success you have to share with those you love.
Happiness in the Here and Now:
You may not be ready to take the leap and leave your present life behind for the life of your dreams. Fortunately, Hayley also had some advice for loving the life you already have – regardless of your current circumstances:
TREAT WHAT’S AVAILABLE TO YOU AS A BLESSING – EVEN THE SMALL THINGS: For example, she said, you can pour water and take a bath and that might be nice. But you can enhance it easily with a few candles. With minimum extra effort, you can make it luxurious with lavender oil and even a glass of champagne. In other words, it doesn’t take a lot to turn something routine into a practice of self-love.
FIND THE GOOD EVEN IN THE BAD: Hayley believes that one of the most important reasons she is consistently experiencing joy is that she has adopted the outlook that no matter what happens, big or small, it’s for her highest good. She interprets events that may be difficult or painful to still be necessary to lead her to an even better life. It leads to the feeling, she said, that “I’m taken care of” no matter what.
CELEBRATE: Hayley doesn’t save celebrations for special occasions – she makes celebration a habit. Don’t wait for opportunities to rejoice, create those opportunities regularly. Joy comes more easily when exercised often.
STAND IN TRUTH: Being consistently honest may not always be easy, but in Hayley’s experience it leads to less drama. Be honest about who you are, how you feel, what you want and what you don’t.
If Hayley’s ideas resonate with you and you’re interested in living with more passion, purpose and presence I highly recommend checking out Soul Sparkle. And for women who are looking to build purposeful businesses, consider signing up for the Soul Sparkle Summit in March of 2018!
Hayley is the CEO and Founder of Soul Sparkle, Inc. events and experiences and the creator of the Soul Sparkle Spa and Jewelry Collection. She is a spiritual guide and author of the forthcoming book, Soul Sparkle Living: Your Guide to Creating a Magical Life, and host of Soul Sparkle Radio. Hayley is one part fun fairy, one part wise sage, with a burning desire to bottle up and light on fire all things magical that bring women back to their own soul and their sparkle within.
Hayley spent 20 years in the corporate wellness industry consulting over 200 employer clients, leading strategy/innovation and new product development for a national health management organization. She has her 200 hour RYT in Kundalini Yoga, Tantra, and Power Flow Yoga and is also a Certified Raw Food Chef, a Certified Health Education Specialist, and a Certified Wellness Program Director from the National Wellness Institute.
She has always felt called to help other women craft their own soul centered business, that also makes a global impact. Her vision is big – a million women serving a million women. In October 2016, she left her corporate path and began Operation Gypsy (a dream years in the making). Since making the leap she has literally sprinkled her magic across multiple continents, and has no plans of going back. She is finally living her soul sparkle life of wandering the world, giving back, and successfully running a highly impactful business.
January 2, 2018 | Ryan Rynbrandt